If there’s one thing that us moms have really mastered, it’s feeling guilty. Told your daughter you were out of ice cream so you could finish it when she went to bed? Convinced your son that hockey wasn’t that much fun so you wouldn’t have to deal with the huge investment of time and money? Invented a fake work trip to avoid taking part in the school fundraiser? Chances are you’re going to feel guilty about it at some point!
But the fact of the matter is that parenting is hard…and none of us are perfect! We’re going to mess up. We’re going to do things we regret. And sometimes, we’re going to feel guilty about something we really shouldn’t! There are the odd times that we feel we’ve really messed up. At those times, we need to apologize, forgive ourselves and move on. But there are also times we feel guilty and we really shouldn’t! If you’ve got Mom Guilt about any of these four things, it’s time to give yourself a break and #EndMomGuilt!
1) Going Out for Date Night
Date night isn’t just a fun night out for you and your husband, it’s a chance to stay connected as a couple and ensure a healthy relationship…something that will both benefit your kids right now and help them learn about the dynamic of a healthy relationship. Find a reliable sitter or a nearby family member, take off for the evening and enjoy a good meal, a movie WITHOUT animated characters or a few drinks at your favourite pub. You both deserve the chance to spend time with the love of your life!
2) Not Making Dinner from Scratch
Sure, we’d all love to be that perfectly planned parent that does a full week’s worth of dinner prep on Sunday and then whips up delicious and nutritious meals on even the busiest days. But a recent study actually found that 7 out of 10 moms wish they could spend less time preparing meals. And if you feel the same way, there’s nothing wrong with a meal made with convenience in mind. Personally, I always have Marie Callender’s 3 Meat Lasagna in my freezer for busy nights. It has wholesome ingredients, great homemade flavour and oven-baked taste even though it’s ready in minutes in the microwave! Available at grocery stores across Canada for a suggested retail price of $6.99, dinner’s never been easier!
3) Throwing Out Artwork
Your child’s artwork is an expression of his personality, and it’s only natural to want to save each and every masterpiece your kids create. But all that paper can and will overwhelm your home if you don’t take charge early on. Hang one special piece on the fridge or even in a frame on the wall and replace it periodically when new art comes home. Take pictures of everything else so that you can still look back and admire your child’s creativity, then toss it all out and enjoy the lack of clutter!
4) Treating Yourself (and ONLY Yourself)
Whether you have a secret stash of high-quality chocolate that the kids don’t know about or a monthly brunch with friends while they stay home, there’s nothing wrong with reminding yourself that you deserve fun things too! When you give yourself those little treats that are just for you, you feel happier and more relaxed. And that makes you a more patient and effective parent. So adjust the monthly budget to include a regular massage or keep a few slices of your favourite cheesecake in the freezer just for you. Your hard work parenting deserves a reward!
Marie Callender’s knows most moms are far too hard on themselves, so the company has created a moving video reminding moms to give themselves a break and let go of the mom guilt. Our little ones are going to be fine; we just need to remember that our best is more than good enough! Check out these great videos and see if they remind you of some of your own mom guilt moments! And don’t forget to check out the #EndMomGuilt hashtag and share your own stories too!
As hard as I try, I still can’t help occasionally giving into the mom guilt when I feel that I’ve failed my sons in some way. But I’m much better about it than I used to be and the more my boys grow into caring and responsible children, the more I know that the mistakes I do make are far less important than the endless time and effort I put into being a mom. No matter what little things trigger your mom guilt, the time has come to #EndMomGuilt and celebrate your success as a parent. After all, in the eyes of our kids, we’ll always be the best moms ever!
Amanda S. says
Oh man, when my first was born I was the worst about feeling guilty on anything I do as a mom. It’s gotten better but I did realize today that I’m always so focused on making sure my husband and kids have everything they need but now I’m due for a little “pampering” (aka buying some winter clothes so I don’t freeze!)
Victoria Ess says
That lasagna looks great! I totally relate to the guilt from not making meals from scratch.
Abbie N says
I ‘ll work on it 🙂
Robyn L says
I can relate on all points; it does get easier as time goes on though. a well written article.
Florence Cochrane says
I still have a box of artwork and little things from my 34 and 37 year old. Love the post.
Wendy Gage says
I don’t have to guilt myself my son loves to do that himself being 15 and all but I try not to let it bother me.
Cheryl says
Oh the mom guilt!! I am so guilty!! That is why I have one pair of shoes and they are sandals??!!! So time to mom to spend some money on herself !!!
Alison Braidwood says
I agree with all of these points. If you’re frazzled all the time your kids won’t benefit.
Stephanie LaPlante says
Yes I totally agree. Mommies are important too.
Elizabeth Matthiesen says
I think throwing out artwork is the toughest but with 7 kids there wasn’t too much choice. I do still have a little wooden car that one of my sons made at school. My oldest is nearly 40 yrs old and the youngest is already 28!
Cheryl says
I have lots of mom guilt and I am working on it!
Cheryl Almas says
I can relate to needing me time.
kisten visser says
ooo something i need to do more is take some more time for myself and do some things on my own! besides getting my hair done every 2 months lol. my hubby and I love our date nights so at least we get that and I buy store bought food that you can throw in the oven (i love watching recipe videos but barely follow through with them) and i am with you with not keeping every single art piece. we have a bin for my oldest daughter and that is for saving her first year of art work from school 🙂
Lynda Cook says
I love idea #3 with all this technology there is no reason to forget about the artwork, and especially with the portable scanners you could even scan the art work into the computer!
Carole Dube says
I had felt guilty of all these.
I couldn’t keep all the art work. I had a folder and kept some. But you see, I hate keeping stuff. I’m really bad and hate clutters and I have regret about not keeping things. I always feel I have too much things in my house and have the constant need to clean things out. But you know I don’t feel guilty anymore…
Janet M says
I always felt guilty but over the years I realized I couldn’t do everything.
Jennie Yuen says
Thanks for these tips. We are working on it.
Melinda says
I agree, treating yourself once in a while should be a priority!
DORIS HUMBER says
You have made very valid and great points in this post!
kathy downey says
I am guilty of all these.Well said !
Silvia D says
I am Guilty of all of these! Find it so hard to even take time for myself!
Tracey Flattes says
Love the piece about the art work! I always feel so guilty about getting rid of their creations, but you just can’t keep every piece!
angela m says
I loved this video. I find I feel guilty too often when I know I shouldn’t
Doris Calvert says
I think the art work is the hardest, I even saved everything my niece and nephew gave me.
Judy Cowan says
Hard to not have Mom guilt but we do have to look after ourselves too. We have tried the lasagna and it wasn’t bad for store bought.
Wanda Tracey says
I have a hard time taking time for myself.Sometimes it can feel a little overwhelming.I did keep some art things that my children made.I think that’s important and they make great memorabelia and conversation pieces.It can be hard to keep everything though.
Jody D says
So important to refill our own reserves. And so seldom done. Good reminders!
angie andrews says
I have a hard time throwing out the kids art work, but it has to be done or else we would be buried in it lol
Amy Lovell says
Oh man! I can totally relate to all the points made… thanks for the great tips!
debbie s says
i alway feel guilty doing something for myself…gotta work on that one!
Chandra O"Connor says
the throwing out artwork! Oh I did have the guilts then. I made a memory container for my girls and kept some of their works.
Laurie P says
oh the artwork……..I had to make some tough decisions on that this past week. Totally feeling the guilt.
ivy pluchinsky says
I so agree with all of these! Mom’s should not feel guilty about those at all.
Caryn Coates says
Definitely the throwing out the artwork gets to me. I still have artwork from my 16 year old when she was younger. I have thrown some stuff out and it still gets to me