For the most part, bloggers are incredibly supportive of one another and I’m so glad to be a part of the Canadian blogging community.
But, every once in a while, a blogger will attack her peers because she feels that they’re not acting in the “right” way.
It hurts me when I see things like this, but as I thought about events like these, I realized that they are by no means limited to the blogosphere.
High school is what will spring to many minds when public humiliations of this sort are discussed, but even in adult relationships, humans often have the need to criticize and judge each other.
It can be subtle: the mom on the playground commenting that SHE would never let her child eat a pre-packaged snack like the one you just handed your child.
Or it can be more obvious, especially online: a hateful comment that visiting a fast-food restaurant on your vacation has doomed your children to a life of bad health and obesity.
Most of the time it’s subtle. But that doesn’t make it any less hurtful.
I could write about how destructive criticism like this is. I could write about the way it can damage others and the way it contributes to the chronic low self-esteem so many women face.
In fact, I wrote something similar once before. The problem is that making speeches about how hurtful and destructive it is to judge one another is pointless.
Those that agree don’t need to hear about it. And those that don’t aren’t going to be convinced by my blog post that they should change their behaviour.
What I can do, what we can all do, however, is INSPIRE one another. We can look at negative behaviour like this and decide that instead of taking the time to fight a losing battle with people that may never realize how damaging their behaviour is, we can take that energy and use it to make our lives and the lives of others happier and more fulfilled.
It could be as simple as giving a compliment to a stranger. It could be taking the time to answer an email asking for your opinion instead of deleting it. It could be working to make your own life something to be admired, something that will inspire others.
In the end, it doesn’t really matter. If you’re using your energy to create wonderful things for you and for those around you, you’re making a difference.
You’re showing others that no matter what comes your way, you’ll meet it with a smile. And when you do that, you’ll inspire others to do the same.
So take a moment and reach out to somebody this week!
Give that new mother an encouraging comment. Smile at somebody that looks discouraged. Reach out and see how the smallest actions can help make the world a better place. And then leave a comment about it to inspire others to do the same.
Negativity and positivity are both contagious.
Which one would you rather spread?
It’s sad that people are so judgmental. I’d much rather be supportive and positive about things.
It really is sad, isn’t it? In the end those people are hurting themselves more than anyone else…
But I have to admit, seeing that behaviour also makes me so, so grateful that I know so many wonderful, supportive people. :)
This is beautiful and very true. If we spend more time building each other up instead of tearing each other down there would be far fewer problems in this world.
Isn’t that the truth! But one woman at a time, we’ll make a difference! :)
What a fantastic post. I couldn’t agree more. Thanks for sharing, Kathryn!
Thanks Christine! I’m not one bit surprised you agree; I see you living this philosophy each and every day. :)
Thank you for this. Very well written.
Practice acts of random kindness.
Thank you so much, Chris! That’s it exactly; I don’t think there’s anything that is more effective for counteracting negative behaviour than lots and lots of positive actions! :)
I have a motto I follow and I try my hardest to not deviate from, even when I’m tempted and when people are mean and play dirty, trust me… I’ve struggled, but I know being mean back doesn’t do me any good in the long run.
Never lose your grip on kindness, love and loyalty!!
I wrote a post on it too: http://www.shasherslife.com/2012/03/dont-lose-your-grip-on-kindness.html
I remember that post, Shash; I LOVED it! And I think that’s probably the best motto I’ve ever heard. :)
I have a few I always keep in mind, but one of mine that I remember at times like this is: “You can’t do anything about the way other people act, you can only do something about the way you act.” It helps me remember that no matter what comes my way, the only thing I need to be concerned about is whether I’m reacting in a manner I can feel proud of later. :)
that’s a good one too! :)
Thank you for this lovely post! YOU are an inspiration and thank you for sharing that wonderful spirit! Have a great weekend – this has started me off on the right foot today :) Oh – and my coffee! LOL
Aww, thanks so much Amanda! I feel the same way about you; I love reading your site because it’s always positive and uplifting. :) And I’m glad I could help start your weekend off right!
Hurray, yeah, love this, and am sharing it everywhere I can. I am a firm believer that people should build one another up…the benefits for everyone are just exponential. Kudos to you for the great post.
Thanks so much for the kind comment, Rosie! I agree totally, building each other up doesn’t just help other people. In the end, it helps us too! :)